Short update: I got a new sound card for the computer, so at least I won't have to use that junky on-board Soundmax. I feel stupid for not having done it sooner. The new card is just a cheap Soundblaster LIVE, but its better than the old one and records better as well. I bought a stereo-to-headphone adapter so I can now record the guitars directly into the PC. I'm hoping that will help, since having a live instrument to fool around with sometimes makes it easier to create.
On another note, gish got the new Die Warzau and I tell you it is absolutely awesome. Buy it today if you're a fan of industrial music. The album is simply amazing and ground-breaking. They shame me and my crapulence mightily.
Oh well, that's all for now. Thanks for being patient with me.